Is that it?
by LegacyChick
Summary: After the wedding of their friends, Jon is behaving strange. Is their secret, little affair over or can Randy somehow take his doubts away? Pairing: Randy/Dean Warning: Slash, Fluff, Angst


**Hey there everyone! No, I'm not back. Sorry. This is only just a fluffy, angsty, little something I needed to get out of my system. Two jobs and a study are keeping me more than busy. But hey, you never know.**

 **Pairing: Randy/Jon (Dean Ambrose)**

 **Warning: Slash (for once no smut ;) )**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one.**

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„What's wrong?" Randy'd a strange feeling all through the wedding, but never got the chance to ask his lover. So as soon as they walked into his hotel-room and the door fell shut behind him, he started his interrogation. He didn't get far though.

"Nothing." Jon sealed Randys lips with a kiss, hands on the slightly taller males cheeks. On every other day, Randy would've probably fallen for the distraction, but he knew something was off. Even the kiss didn't feel as usual. The passion and lust was somehow missing from Jons side.

"Jon, what is wrong?" Even though he loved the ash-blondes touch, he gently pushed him away. The fact alone that Jon turned away from him and avoided all eye-contact only confirmed his instincts. That alone felt weird to him. Never in their time together had they talked about emotions and shit. They both weren't the type for that. Their secret affair was basically fucking and discussing sports. But over the course of the past six months their bond had somehow grown, without either of them really wanting it.

"Is it the wedding?"

Mutual friends, colleagues had tied the knot and while he'd been just a visitor, Jon had had the honour of walking the bride down the aisle. And Randy had seen Jons mood drop with every single step.

"It's nothing." "Jon!" "Okay, yeah…" Jon ran a shaky hand through his –for the special occasion- neatly combed hair, turning it into the mess it usually was. "I just… You know…"

And even though he didn't say it out loud, Randy knew. Loudly exhaling, Randy took a step closer to Jon, unsure of what to do, what to say. "I'm just wondering where this here will lead, okay?" Randy understood, having asked himself the very same question many times before. But they didn't have an option. Not really. "Jon, we're not Young. We're not just some midcarders or jobbers. If we came out in public, our careers would be busted. Our lives would be completely turned upside down. You knew that from the beginning."

Hell, yes he did. Randy saw it in the way the blondes shoulders tensed shortly before he finally turned around to face him. Whatever it was that lay in Jons eyes, Randy had never seen it before. "You know, every time I see a couple happily kissing n public, making sheep eyes at each other, gently touching… I can't help but to think of my future. Our future. We're never going to have that. It's always going to be like this, right? Sneaking around, secretly fucking? No kisses in public, no touches, not even words of comfort or any shit like that."

Jon knew the answer to that question already, but he refused to give up hope so easily. Never in his wildest dreams would he have thought that one day he'd fall in love with a guy, let alone Randy, but it'd happened and now he was stuck. That flash of hurt in Randys eyes went completely unnoticed by him.

"You can still have that, you know? Just not with me." Randy never saw the slap coming.

"You're suggesting I get myself a cover-up? Like Kim's for you?" It was unfair and he knew that. Randy loved Kim, or had, he didn't exactly know. They never talked about her after all. Just like himself, Randy'd never before had anything with a guy. All of this had been new not only to him, but to Randy, too. "Are you really that fucking blind, Orton? I don't WANT anyone but you. Fuck, if I did, I would've looked for someone else months ago. I'm not just one of your dirty little flings. I'm not stupid nor heartless. I'm…" While Randy'd been rubbing his stinging cheek during his ramblings, he now had enough.

The kiss was far away from being innocent or soft. The tattooed man saw Jons arm rising this time from the corner of his eyes, clutching his wrist before the hand could connect with his cheek yet again. He put everything into this kiss, all his pent-up, suppressed emotions, all his feelings, all his energy, leading Jons body towards the wall until the younger male was trapped. Only then did he withdraw his lips from the blondes, heavily breathing, shaking, grunting. "You're an idiot when you think, you're the only one feeling this way, Good."

Jons eyes fluttered open at that, wide oceanblues staring slightly shocked at his lovers revelation. Maybe it really was him who'd been blind the whole time. "Jesus, Jon, I know how you feel and even though we are completely different, this is definitely something we have in common, but…"

"We could make it work."

"We'd lose half of our fanbase."

"We'd gain new ones."

"My parents would disown me."

"Your mom would never let that happen. She loves her pretty little Randal too much."

Even though Randy couldn't hold back a little chuckle at that, he shook his head nonetheless.

"I'd never see my kids again."

"Oh come on! Sam would agree more with me than she did with Kim. And Kim… well… Okay, you'd be screwed." Though jokingly said, Jon knew the seriousness of the situation. They both fell silent, just looking at each other, standing almost nose-to-nose. Neither knew how to go on from there, though both knew they didn't want to end this. Not now. Not ever.

"Maybe…" Jon shushed Randys attempt to say something, by putting a finger to his lips and shaking his head. "Don't. Don't say it." Randy kissed the blondes finger in silent agreement, before placing his hands on his lovers hips and pulling him close. "No more words." They'd talked more today than in the past months combined, admitted to more feelings than ever before, to themselves and to each other. They were done talking, though both knew this wouldn't be the last time the topic was going to come up.

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 **Dunno what it is with this pairing, but they just... they're perfect together :-P**

 **Don't forget to give me your two cents ;)**


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